I tell the story of imaging willpower being a beach ball. How long can you hold that beach ball underwater before it pops up? That’s the same as willpower; we can only hold on tightly for so long until we give up. That is why willpower never lasts.
So if it is not willpower that we need more of, what is it?
It is committing to losing weight.
So many ladies I talk to tell me they are “trying” to lose weight. Trying is not committing.
When you say you are trying, that is you giving yourself the option of quitting. If you are ‘trying,’ you will quit when things get hard because you are not 100% committed.
If you want to lose weight, you have to be willing to be fully committed.
Most people are good at trying and then quitting but not very good at committing.
SO what is a commitment?
Here are a couple of definitions:
-A promise or firm decision to do something:
-The act of binding yourself (intellectually or emotionally) to a course of action
For me, commitment is I will do whatever I need to do no matter what, until I get the results I want AND quitting is not an option! Along the way, I will adjust what I need to do in order to reach my goals. I will not give up and quit!
Are you willing to commit to losing weight no matter what?
How you know if you are 100% committed is if you are willing to give me $10,000 if you don’t lose weight?
What thoughts come up for you when about giving me money if you don’t lose the weight.
If you are anything like I was, my brain would yell out, but what if I don’t lose the weight? I will be out of the money.
But if I were 100% committed, my thought would be “ok, what is it going to take, what is it I need to do so that I will lose the weight.”
Do you see the difference?
If you are willing to agree to my deal, you are 100% committed because you are confident you will do whatever you can, so there is no risk.
When we are committed, we show up differently than when we are not.
So why don’t people commit? It is because of the feelings that come up with committing and then following, though. Think about how uncomfortable you will feel with what you have to do to stay committed.
There will be times when you will experience negative emotions, and you will have to allow yourself to be with those emotions instead of giving in or quitting.
How you figure out how to truly commit is deciding ahead of time to commit.
An example of deciding ahead of time to commit is marriage. Are you committed to your marriage or you trying in your marriage? When you are committed, and another man walks by that catches your eye, you don’t go running after him because you decided ahead of time that you are only going to be with your husband. You also have decided ahead of time that you will work out your difference no matter what. You are all in, and when things get difficult, you don’t quit and look for solutions to make it better and work.
So the same is with losing weight. If you are 100% committed, you will look for the solution instead of quitting when it gets challenging. When you are out with friends, you will say to yourself that I am committed to losing weight, and I don’t need food to enjoy my time with them.
That is a commitment. It is building a relationship with yourself in that you will decide ahead of time what you will do, and then you follow through on that no matter what negative emotions come up.
The key is that if you end up having something off your plan, there is no beating yourself up because that will only tear down the relationship with yourself. You take a look at what you did without judgement so that you can find what you can do differently next time.
Having a strong relationship with yourself is all about honouring and following through on what you say, you will do no matter what and being kind and compassionate with yourself.
No one is perfect, but if you choose to commit, you will find a way to make it happen.
If you’d like to learn more about how to get started with losing weight in a way that goes beyond the food, that is the solution to long term weight loss, then click here to book a free call. On the call, we will find out what is holding you back, and we will then set up a plan so that you can get started in losing weight in a sustainable way.
You are worth it!
RN, Certified Weight, Emotional Eating and Confidence Coach
P. S. Join my Facebook group here, where I am there to support you and teach the tools to help you lose weight for the last time.