Is there a situation in your life that has you in discomfort or pain, and you find yourself emotionally eating?
You eat what you had not planned on eating, or you have more wine than what you said you would and then end up in more pain because of what you just did.
It wasn’t bad enough with the initial discomfort, but then you added even more on top! No wonder you are suffering emotionally, and it is so unnecessary!
What can you do?
Well, let’s start with what is emotional eating.
Emotional eating is when you turn to food to try to numb out or distract yourself from a feeling you are having.
Those feelings have you turning to food or alcohol because you view them as negative. You don’t like that feeling; your brain doesn’t like that feeling because it is painful, and our brains are designed to do everything possible to avoid pain and seek pleasure.
So guess what, you are normal!
You have never been shown any other way to manage your mind and your emotions, so you turn to food or alcohol.
Here’s how it is most likely going for you right now.
There is a situation; let’s say you lost your job or this Pandemic, which created a feeling of sadness, stressed, anxious, overwhelmed, angry, any or all of the above and then that bag of potato chips, those cookies, that ice-cream call your name!
All you want to do is eat, you think you are physically hungry, but your hunger is an emotional one.
So you eat to have some relief from the feeling, and yeah, it makes you feel better for that moment while you are eating, but when you are finished, and you realize you overate, you go into the beating yourself up mode.
You now have more negative feelings like; guilt, shame, anger or sadness from thoughts like, “I wasn’t strong enough,” “I should have had more willpower,” or “why did I do it again.”
When you get into beating yourself up, this is when you create unnecessary suffering.
You had the initial feelings that didn’t feel good from the situation, and then you added more negative feelings on top of them.
So how do you end the unnecessary suffering?
What some people might tell you to do is eliminate those initial feelings in the first place and also think positive thoughts; that is not what I want you to do.
What I want you to do is first, stop beating yourself up– that is not needed and definitely not helpful!
Try being kind and loving and compassionate to yourself. You knew no other way to deal with that negative feeling but to turn to food or alcohol. Those have been your comfort for so long, so why would you think that you should have done anything different?
When you have ended the unnecessary suffering, then it is time for yourself to allow the initial negative feelings that came up from the situation that happened.
Don’t resist that feeling; just allow and accept it to be there. Feel where it is in your body. What does it feel like? How does it feel? What colour is it?
Process the feeling, be with the feeling and when you do this, it loses the power it has over you.
Now that the feeling no longer controls you, it’s time to look at what other thoughts you can have about losing your job or about the Pandemic.
All your feelings are created from your thoughts, so if you want to feel better you have to allow ALSO thoughts to be there.
When my clients work with me, and we work on their thoughts, the feelings of stress, overwhelm, anger or frustration happen far less in their life. And if they do occur, they do not control them like they used to!
Is this something you would like help with? If the answer is YES then book a free call here so that we can chat.
You are worth it, Hugs!
Karen
